Saying No

Were you brought up with the ideology that you need to put the needs of others before your own? Does it make you feel sick to think about telling someone yes to a request even when ever fiber in your body says NO!? Do you have resentments toward people, places or things that you’ve said yes to when deep down you really wanted to respond with no? You don’t need to be afraid to tell someone no. Saying yes just for the sake of making someone else happy or making yourself feel like a good person isn’t healthy long term. Feeling obligated to do something you really don’t want to do can end up breeding resentment and fueling anger. It’s perfectly fine to tell someone no if your bandwidth, energy or interest just isn’t there. Choose to do things because you want to, because they bring you joy, because they bring mutual joy between you and the other person, etc. Exercise your voice and your right to say no without explanation. If you’re on the fence for whether you’d like to say yes or no, simply let the person know you need some time to think about it and you’ll get back to them. It doesn’t matter who it is, be it family, friends, coworkers or strangers, you need to honor where you’re at energetically, emotionally, physically, and financially. If it doesn’t feel right, say no. Saying no doesn’t automatically mean you’re hurting someone’s feelings. If you’ve got a deep rooted belief that your lovability is tied to the things you do for others, it’s time to challenge that belief. Are you afraid you’ll lose the love and support of someone if you say no to a request? The bottom line is that you need to love yourself enough to say no when you need to. Who are some of the people you have a hard time saying no to? What are the requests you have a hard time saying no to? Take the time necessary to identify where you need to make some shifts in order to put yourself as a priority and stop allowing yourself to be inundated with requests that you are not interested in fulfilling.